Award winning creation....

My following creation won the "Best picture of the month" award on facebook...

Remix of Ansoo....

Truly yours,
Ammar A S

A....

The ansoo says it all....
i draw crap.... drawing is not my passion... just a time pass...

Hip-hop

I love hip-hop music... gives me so much courage and attitude....
oh by the way, where was i for so long.. i know i know its been a while... i dunno where i was... just in search of myself..... lost.. dead inside... f'd up... i dunno....

my fav rappers... 2pac, the game, nas....

Tears...

Suicidal Thoughts...

One of my fav songs...

Suicidal Thoughts

When I die, stuff it I wanna go to hell
Cause I'm a piece of junk, it ain't hard to freakin' tell
It don't make sense, goin' to heaven with the goodie-goodies
Dressed in white, I like black Tims and black hoodies
God will probably have me on some real strict scale
No sleepin' all day, no having fun
Hangin' with the goodie-goodies loungin' in paradise
Stuff that thing, I wanna tote guns and shoot dice
All my life I been considered as the worst
Lyin' to my mother, even stealin' out her purse
I wonder if I died, would tears come to your eyes?
Forgive me for my disrespect, forgive me for my lies
I swear to God I just want to slit my wrists and end this life
Throw the Magnum to my head, threaten to pull it
And squeeze, until the bed's, completely red
I'm glad I'm dead, a worthless buddah head
The stress is buildin' up, I can't even think
I can't believe suicide's on my freakin' mind
I want to leave, I swear to God I feel like death is callin' me
Nah you wouldn't understand
You see its kinda like the crack did to Pookie, in New Jack
Except when I cross over, there ain't no comin' back
Should I die on the train track, like Remo in Beatstreet
People at the funeral frontin' like they miss me
I reach my peak, I can't speak,
I'm sick of ppl lyin', I'm sick of ppl hawkin',
matter of fact, I'm sick of talkin'.........

Pakistanis got what they deserve...

Lets bad-mouth something...
No offence to anyone...
DONT READ IF YOU CANT CONTROL YOUR FEELINGS BECAUSE IM DISHING OUT WHAT I CAN TAKE...
Constructed criticism is good for health afterall...
Pakistan got the chor Zardari, the man who once said that while changing the constitution that constitution is not the word of Quran and Hadees that cannot be changed. Not realising that the oath of constitution is taken on Quran and Hadeez. So Pakistan deserves him...
Pakistanis voted for his party Pee Pee Pee, so why moan now...

Most of us have never thought of a 'change' in our lives...
We have failed to produce an intellectual being in decades...
We have never been to our neighbours who had not had food for days and slept hungry...
We think money can buy love and happiness...
So Pakistan deserves everything happening...
We need a 'change'...
Life is way too short...

One day u'll realise, i was right...

I know im trying to sell mirrors to blind people. But one day hopefully they will realize that i was right...
I hate living away from my family, i know im right.
One of my friends, who is a doctor, told me that a son cant live away from his mother...
One of my friends, who is like my elder muslimah sister, with vast knowledge of Islam, told me that when a boy gets depressed about things like these, home sick, starts missing his loved ones, he should immediately get married...
I hate pardes, i know im right...
I DARE anyone to argue with me on this or disagree with me and prove me wrong, i dare anyone is this world... I know im right, and if im right then i'll fight for what i believe in...
So one day... I'll be gone... my existance will fade then you'll realize...
Bottom line: You can take the horse to river but you cant force him to drink water...

Not talking to anyone...

Im not talking to anyone. Be it ANYONE... I've slammed my door at the world... My heart has got nothing but hatred towards this world...
So everyone puhleeez, leave me the heck alone...
This world is bullshit... Screw it...
I wonder when will i be happy... Its not funny...

Ah...! that made me feel better.... Thankyou...

What i drew at work today....

My scanner couldnt scan the full page....

Why so serious?

Why are some people always so serious? They need to put a smile on their face.... if they cant, then someone needs to carve a smile (with a knife) on their face.... so that they smile forever and permanently.... even when they are serious...

Let me introduce to my fictional character.... called The Joker....
the guy who never smiled until i had to carve a smile on his face with a knife...

And you know the only sensible way to live in this world is without rules...

When i grow old...

hmmm....

Man vs Woman

Back in action....

Step aside...

Guess who's back...

Bad News...

okay i might not post anymore, phone slipped off my hands and kinda got damaged, have to send it in for repair, the keypad is so stiff and makes it almost impossible to write..
On the other hand im not allowed to use computer....

Cloudy dayz....

Our love flown,completely faded,
now my life’s all gloomy, forever shaded…
just as the sun breaks,through my cloudy sky,
I think of u, den the heavens cry…
Overcome by a storm, tears falling like da rain ,
didn’t think it would be like dis ,not to dis day…
In time I thought - i’d see a brighter day,
but dis cloud hangs over me & wont go away…
It follows me everywhere I go,
bringing rumbles of thunder, as thoughts of U flow…
This cloud isn’t seasonal, its not like the weather,
It will be with me for as long as - We are not together...

Most powerful women in the world....

Angela Dorothea Merkel
Chancellor of Germany
Age: 54

Indra Nooyi
CEO, Pepsi
Age: 50

Sheila C. Bair
Chairperson of the U.S. Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation
Age: 55

Condoleezza Rice
United States Secretary of State
Age: 54

Anne Lauvergeon
French businesswoman, President of Areva
Age: 49

Safra Catz
President and CFO Oracle
Age: 59

Angela Braly
President and CEO WellPoint
Age: 46

Anne Mulcahy
Chairman and CEO, Xerox
Age: 53

Meg Whitman
CEO and President , eBay
Age: 50

Irene Rosenfeld
CEO, Kraft Foods
Age: 52

Oprah Winfrey
Chairman, Harpo Inc.
Age: 52

Susan Arnold
Vice Chair, Beauty and Health, Procter & Gamble
Age: 52

Christine Poon
Vice Chairman, Worldwide Chairman, Medicines and Nutritionals Group, Johnson & Johnson
Age: 53

Anne Sweeney
Co-Chair, Disney Media Networks
President , Disney–ABC Television Group
Age: 48

Ann Livermore
EVP, Technology Solutions Group , Hewlett-Packard
Age: 48

Ann Moore
Chairman and CEO, Time Inc.
Age: 56

Ginni Rometty
SVP, Global Business Services, IBM
Age: 49

Mary Minnick
EVP; President of Marketing, Strategy, and Innovation, Coca-Cola
Age: 46

Amy Pascal
Co-Chairman, Sony Pictures Entertainment, Sony
Age: 48

Susan Decker
CFO Yahoo!
Age: 43

Christina Gold
CEO, Western Union
Age: 59

Stacey Snider
CEO, DreamWorks SKG, Viacom
Age: 45

The power of words/text:Buried desires...

I feel like talking. I wish i had someone to talk to, someone to chill with, someone to share something with, someone to see through this facade. Shared joy is double joy and shared sorrow is half sorrow. Anyone? Noone? Ok. So my boring blog, i therefore turn to you, writing this using a keypad with 26 alphabets, if put in a sequence they are called texts, trying to feel better. But text is very powerful, powerful enough, powerful enough to describe my feelings, powerful enough to play with feelings. Text are words and words never ever die. Im not talkative. Im one of the quitest persons u'll ever come across but when i talk i can scream. Im loud so that everyone can hear me, hearing is useless without observing, a lecturer, debater, speech giver is useless and makes no sense if he cant portray a picture in his words, if he cant let his listeners observe him, if he cant paint the picture...
There are two sides of me, one im having now at present, the other one i left in Pakistan. I dont think i've changed, this is how i am here, you can put the blame on time. Im stranger to myself, im in search of my other side...
I might moan and try to be unhappy but this is not real me, its my this side's fault, happier and sad side. One day i hope i finally merge myself into one, one Ammar, physical one, and then flush all my negativeness, sorrows down the drain instead of writing them here like a looser on the vast space of nothingness....
Meanwhile i can only pray for those times to come...

Its raining...

It started with drizzle... fine rain drops falling, touching my room's window... Couldnt resist, opened the window... trying to catch some raindrops, they fell on my palm like some diamonds from the sky. Then it started to rain heavily, very heavily, it started to pour, raining cats and dogs. Heard loud thunders. I always said that i hate rain because it makes me sad, but its not true, rain is a blessing, i love rain, but it still makes me sad, it brings back lots of memories.

There are 43 million handsets in South Africa, of 49 million people....

According to BBC....

95% of the South Africans own cellphones... wow...
About 30 million messages are sent every day in South Africa...
There are currently six million people living with HIV/AIDS in South Africa...
Project Masiluleke will send one million free text messages a day to push people to be tested and treated...



SOURCE: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/technology/7688268.stm

Nearly got arrested....

At 9:45pm! I forgot to buy the bread... and all the shops were closed (because it was late), so i had to rush to the gas station.. i drove at 150 kmph, didn't stop at stop signs.. then a police car passed me on the other road, then i saw from the rear view that 2 police cars are chasing me... i didn't stop... they chased me for few mins then i slowed down...
3 officers jumped out, pointed a gun at me telling me to step out... they wanted to arrest me and take me to police station but after recognizing me... they left me with a warning.... i apologized....
It was fun.. but scary at the same time...Scary, not because i was scared of police but because i forgot to buy the bread n dad would've kicked my butt... and if he finds out how i drive.. I'd have to walk for the whole year...
SA police is very strict.... they follow shoot-to-kill policy because SA has the highest rates of crime in the world...
Had i not stopped for 30 more seconds, i would find helicopters chasing me...

Never mess with cops...

This is Bullcrap....

WTF! all of a sudden im unable to upload pics.... WHAT on earth is wrong with this blogger??

America going bankrupt...

The world's so-called best country is falling....

I wonder how muslims in Amreeka feel when their tax dollars are funding the war on terrorism which is killing innocent muslims around the world... one muslim indirectly killing another?
America is the greatest enemy of Islam....

Bottom line: The Debt Crisis Is Now the Greatest Threat to the American Republic...

When im bored... i draw...

well!!! i was bored at work..

Hot day....

Free bird, but prefers to stay here. It was very hot day.

Don't tell me....

Don't tell me the sky's the limit when the stars are up above;
Don't tell me like is all there is when in my heart there's love;
Don't tell me there's things that i can't be, there's nothing i can't do;
Don't tell me that i won't succeed, I'm not another YOU...

OMG!!!! OMG!!!!! i can now upload pics..........

wowwwwwww!!!!

thanx to Samsung Omnia...

NOW EVERYONE! FASTEN YOUR SEAT BELTS.... YOU ARE ON A RIDE OF YOUR LIFETIME....
THIS IS BLOG IS ABOUT TO GET VERY EXCITING....

P.S: I'll edit some of the previous and old posts, gotta add some pics...

1 week....

Everyday without you is like night... its very very dark....
cuz you are my sunshine....
1 week went like 100 years... like a century....

our love will never ever fade....

:(

Bought a new phone....

Samsung Omnia...

nice phone, .. internet is fastest ever...
it'll be fun to blog....

gonna get an apple iphone soon....

and i still cant upload photos on this site...

450 dayz & counting...

Let the countdown begin...

450 dayz...

Missing you so much...

:-(
missing you like desert misses rain...

Never play with fire... & look inside an ocean...

Never play with fire... u'll always end up burnt... I think fire is blind, fire cant see, fire is wild, aggressive, fire doesnt care, it'll burn u no matter who you are... no matter what you are...
Have you ever looked deep inside an ocean? small fishes never ever threaten or challenge big fishes....

ahh that made me feel better...

King vs Queen

No king rules forever... and Queen is not the end of the fancy moves... (in chess) the game/chess can still go on without queen in it, so queen is just a pawn with bunch of fancy moves... But when king faces check mate, thats when it is over....

Mission: Part 3

I was told not to accompany the cops since they did not want any civilian involved. They stormed the house, caught the guy. Took him to police station, started to interogate him. He mentioned some other names, he was part of a huge group. In few hours police had detained 5 suspects. All of them admitted of being selling stolen goods and committing street crimes. But still we had not found those two, who performed that armed robbery. During late nights we were called to police station for identity parade, to identify those two guys. But till now police has failed to nab them.
and the search goes on...

Mission: Part 2

This sunday, my cousin Mani did something against my will.. something very bad.... something that i dont even wanna mention here.. the consequences of those things were, one of the shop workers (who was riding my brother's bike) fell hard, got injured and the bike was badly damaged, other consequence, my dad got robbed.... hope he learns from his mistakes... since he promised me he would never do that again...
Today at 6am my boys, (i gave them duty to check out the areas and streets at night) told me that they saw those 2 robbers walking on the street, leaving the town, with them was another notorious guy (we knew him and he was already the prime suspect). We went to the police station at 11am, this time i went to the police commissioner, at first i told him of the behavior of the other police men, had they searched the house last night, we could have caught them, he asked for their names and filed a complaint against them.
Then we told him about that guy, gave him his address, and how we saw him walking with those robbers.
At 12am a CID team arrived at my dad's shop, to check for the fingerprints, footprints, dog units and DNA test... but they didn't found much evidence....
The whole day we were spying and keeping an eye on that one guy... not letting out of our sight...
At 5pm, a very special task force and massive police team was set up by the commissioner, the police at around 5:30pm stormed the house, there were 7 police cars packed with 19 cops....

Mission: Part 1

So i got back home, took dad to the clinic at around 12am, dropped him at home. Then i called some of my good friends, told them about what had happened. Asked dad the permission to go out at dead late, met my friends, there was this eye-witness who saw that robbers after this armed robbery looked very calm and didn't panic and walked very slowly outta shop. The way he described that appearance of the robbers to my friends and the foot prints. Surprisingly the people who lived just next door to my dad's shop were already notorious. After doing much research and investigation at 2am, it was found that those guys are hiding in a room. We were near that room but were scared to approach since those guys had guns. We went to the police station, informed them and told to go with us, i think they were all sleepy and they didn't want to help us and made rude and humorous remarks, until i threatened to take legal actions against them all. They sent 2 police cars with us, again we were near that house, now at this moment, i knew in my heart that anything can happen, there might be a big shoot-out between police and robbers. When we were near that house, i thought police would knock the door off and would get in but one of the police officers resisted and said its dangerous to get in the house like that, i told him this is the best chance, the suspects are hiding in. I could sense fear and silence, it was 2:30am. There were 4 policemen and 7 of my friends. We left the place, with no success... feeling disappointed at the police... they didn't help us.

Dad got robbed, nearly lost his life...

What a bad week...
Today the worst thing happened...
Dad was alone in his shop at around 9pm, the workers had knocked off. Two big back guys came in with guns, robbed him at gunpoint. Dad tried to fight back, one of guys hit him with gun's butt on his head and nearly shot him. Dad started to bleed. Those guys fled with lots of cash. Dad phoned me, i immeditely closed my shop and came to dad. Dad was still bleeding. I called police, the whole city's police arrived at the spot with lots of cars. Massive manhunt was launched. I was with police...

I'll write more.. too stressed to write anything now, i already have enough stress of other things... but this one is gonna be worst...

I swear im gonna get those punks... they cant just hurt my father and get away like that...

If you think life doesnt suck...

Think again...
Life sucks...

Im your angel....

I'll be your cloud up in the sky...
I'll be your shoulder when you cry...
I hear your voices when you call me...
I am your angel...
And when all hope is gone, I'm here...
No matter how far you are, I'm near...
It makes no difference who you are...
Im your angel...

I believe i can fly...

I believe i can fly...
I believe i can touch the sky...
I think about it every night and day...
Spread my wings and fly away...
I believe i can soar...
I see me running through that open door...
I believe i can fly...

u know why?

cuz i believe in me...

if i can see it, i can do it...
if i can see it, i can be it...
if i can dream it, i can turn it into reality...


dua goh,
Ali Ammar.

Blood...

Damn! Blood tastes like shit...

I think im dying...

Living in misery....
Living in pain...
We all have to settle in dust one day, the question is who'll settle in dust first... I can see my time is coming...

65 missed calls...

wow...

definitely a day to remember....

A Message for all the Muslims‏

When Hitler attacked the Jews I was not a Jew, therefore I was not concerned. And when Hitler attacked the Catholics, I was not a Catholic, and therefore, I was not concerned. And when Hitler attacked the unions and the industrialists, I was not a member of the unions and was not concerned. Then Hitler attacked me and the Protestant church - and there was nobody left to be concerned.

-- Pastor Martin Niemöller


USA persecuted the people of Iraq and Afghanistan one by one but the rest of Muslims Ummah didn't do much to put pressure on USA, as they themselves were not being targeted. Eventually USA might work his way through to every Muslim country (Allah forbid) and then there will be nobody left to look after those Muslim nations who were mere spectators up till that time. USA is eying Pakistan next. We still have time to learn from our past mistakes. We need to unite as one Ummah and stick up for each others, otherwise those who are mere observers now would find no friends in the end.

Let us try our level best, whatever is in our control to re-unite the ummah with our words and actions and pray to Allah (s.w.t) for success. May Allah (s.w.t) bless the Muslim Ummah with awareness, wisdom, unity and strength. May Allah (s.w.t) put barakah in our efforts.

Geo sucks and should be banned immediately

I have started to loathe this channel. It was good at start but now i think its getting too much, i loved geo not because they have pretty newscasters but because of their moderate coverage, full of technology. Im not arguing against journalists reporting news. Problem starts when these people try to portray their opinions as news. Their show Capital Talk is example of that. Inviting idiots and dishing out pro terrorist propaganda is not good for the country. GEO... they make it sound like as if country is on fire from end to end, and re-enforcing the image that Pakistan is about to fall apart or terrorists are about to take over the country. Before going to Pakistan geo really scarred the heck out of me, i thought i wont come back alive, but it was totally opposite. White folks around here watch geo and think that condition in Pakistan is worst then that in Iraq. Geo has made Pakistan unstable.
QUESTIONS GEO CANNOT ANSWER:
Why does GEO focus on creating chaos and general discontent?
Why does it act like an instrument of an political party?
Why does Geo behave like the arm of a foreign force?
Why did Geo deliberately broadcast false bad news about the economy when the stock market was booming?
What hand did Geo play in scaring the foreign investors away from Pakistan?
Why did Geo repeat the false news about the growth figures which led to the crash of the stock market?
Why does Geo show wrong Pakistani maps?
Why does Geo almost never cover the insurgencies in India?
Why is Geo so infatuated with Anti-Pakistan Bollywood films?
Why is Geo bent upon creating a “Indianization” of Pakistan?
Why does Geo pay so much attention to Bollywood?
Why does Geo show dead bodies?

GEO supports talibans, talibans are terrorists. Hamid Mirs will keep on glorifying tribals. Poor thing doesn't know that Taliban if they come to power in Pakistan (Allah na kare) would first destroy his dish, and then hang him upside down until he grows a beard and wears an ankle high shalwar. Today taliban killed two traffic cops in Swat area. I mean you have to be the most cruel person on earth to kill an unarmed traffic cop. Taliban are out their to destroy Pakistan all the name of Islam. Terrorists outfits should not be allowed to give their version of story when they blow up a building or slaughter a hostage to justifying their crimes, and that is exactly what the Geo & clowns like Hamid Mir are doing. By spreading the army-killing-innocent-civilians word, they're only adding more fuel to the already beyond controlling point fire. They're creating terrorist sympathizers. Hardly ever Kamran Khan, Hamid Mir or other hosts talk about anything positive. It is always like Pakistan is about to fall apart where India is about to become a super power. Geo had overseas Pakistanis really worried about Pakistan.....

Chinese: life after death...

One of the chinese guy started teasing my culture... while he was on his way to his church...
I asked, do u believe in life after death?
He said no
I said, make fun of my culture and find out if there is life after death...
If there is no life after death, no God, no punishment from God, no judgement day, etc then why do u go to church?

Chinese guy disappeared....

One brain can change the world... just one brain...

Im mad at people, im angry with them but my fight is not with people, my argument is not with people, its with the system. On Eid day i met a jew at a supermarket, we got into religious conversation, peaceful one, upon asking why is he a jew, he answered me, its because my parents were jewish, so am i. I hate groups, why, because they always talk non-sense and crap in groups. Our minds are set, our concerns are mindset. Our attitude sucks. We are forced to believe in things. We always swallow what our people have been pushing down our throat. Gist of my post is, we are losers, in this world and hereafter.
Lets analyze:
In this world, we are never trouble-free. Always stuck, always feeling low and gloomy. Money became our sustainer, our rabb.
Hereafter: The world is a test, im failing it. We are gonna face consequences of what we did here.
Our excuse: Everyone is doing it, why not me. Lets do it now i wont do it again.
Loosers we are...
I don't think i can change the world, but i can spark many brains that will change the world, i can create awareness that we people are wrong. Alhamdulillah, so far i have succeeded, plenty people are giving up their evil deeds....
Im writing this because today for the 1st time, i think i did achieve something. One of the dude i knew who had been drinking regularly, stopped drinking after lil lecture of mine. I told him about this mother of all evils, spiritually and physically, sideeffects and disadvantages, Islamically and wordly. He promised that he'll never drink or commit adultery again. His mind was changed. Thats what im talking about, cant change the whole world, but one brain at a time. Previously i changed many people, guidance comes from Allah, i was just a source or mean. Now those people have become sources of others... Its a MUST to invite people to truth. The people i converted to Islam had never heard of the word Islam ever before. They were like some lost sheeps with no shepherd. On the day of judgement when they are about to be thrown in hell. They'll say oh Allah, what was Islam, we did not know, no one told us, we drank, we committee evil sins, no one stopped us, whats our fault. Then Allah will throw those muslims who did not deliver Allah's kalima to others. We'll not enter paradise because we did not stop the bad things happening around us.

Eid Mubarak....

What a boring eid that was. Woke up at 5, prepared, went to read eid salaa t 70km away... in a lil indian community suburb, saw loads of smiling faces, huggings n stuff. Got back, went to work, came home and slept....

oh by the way.. there was only one special person who sent me an eid mubarak text... and was been there with my all the time... never left me alone.. even though we were thousands of miles apart... :~)

¥Θμ шiπ thiš гound...

YOu wiN This roUnD bUT tHe Game IS stilL On...

EVeR PlAyEd cHeSs? No? I PlAyEd, JuSt lIkE In cHeSs, I LeT My eNeMiEs mAkE ThE FiRsT MoVe... YoU MaDe yOuR 1sT MoVe, NoW ItS My tUrN...


TrULY YOuRs,
Åммαг...

Tonight...

Topic of discussion...

Needs and Wants...

Venue: Away...

8 lies of a mother...

...Someone shared it with me, felt like sharing it with you...


This story begins when I was a child: I was born poor. Often we hadn't enough to eat. Whenever we had some food, Mother often gave me her portion of rice. While she was transferring her rice into my bowl, she would say 'Eat this rice, son! I'm not hungry.This was Mother's First Lie.


As I grew, Mother gave up her spare time to fish in a river near our house; she hoped that from the fish she caught, she could give me a little bit more nutritious food for my growth. Once she had caught just two fish, she would make fish soup. While I was eating the soup, mother would sit beside me and eat what was still left on the bone of the fish I had eaten; My heart was touched when I saw it. Once I gave the other fish to her on my chopstick but she immediately refused it and said, 'Eat this fish, son! I don't really like fish.This was Mother's Second Lie.


Then, in order to fund my education, Mother went to a Match Factory to bring home some used matchboxes which she filled with fresh matchsticks. This helped her get some money to cover our needs. One wintry night I awoke to find Mother filling the matchboxes by candlelight. So I said, 'Mother, go to sleep; it's late: you can continue working tomorrow morning.' Mother smiled and said 'Go to sleep, son! I'm not tired.This was Mother's Third Lie


When I had to sit my Final Examination, Mother accompanied me. After dawn, Mother waited for me for hours in the heat of the sun. When the bell rang, I ran to meet her. Mother embraced me and poured me a glass of tea that she had prepared in a thermos. The tea was not as strong as my Mother's love, Seeing Mother covered with perspiration; I at once gave her my glass and asked her to drink too. Mother said 'Drink, son! I'm not thirsty!This was Mother's Fourth Lie.


After Father's death, Mother had to play the role of a single parent. She held on to her former job; she had to fund our needs alone. Our family's life was more complicated. We suffered from starvation. Seeing our family's condition worsening, my kind Uncle who lived near my house came to help us solve our problems big and small. Our other neighbours saw that we were poverty stricken so they often advised my mother to marry again. But Mother refused to remarry saying 'I don't need love.This was Mother's Fifth Lie.


After I had finished my studies and gotten a job, it was time for my old Mother to retire but she carried on going to the market every morning just to sell a few vegetables. I kept sending her money but she was steadfast and even sent the money back to me. She said, 'I have enough money.' That was Mother's Sixth Lie


I continued my part-time studies for my Master's Degree. Funded by the American Corporation for which I worked, I succeeded in my studies. With a big jump in my salary, I decided to bring Mother to enjoy life in America but Mother didn't want to bother her son; she said to me 'I'm not used to high living.That was Mother's Seventh Lie


In her dotage, Mother was attacked by cancer and had to be hospitalized. Now living far across the ocean, I went home to visit Mother who was bedridden after an operation. Mother tried to smile but I was heartbroken because she was so thin and feeble but Mother said, 'Don't cry, son! I'm not in pain.That was Mother's Eighth Lie.


Telling me this, her eighth lie, she died. YES, MOTHER WAS AN ANGEL!

M - O - T - H - E - R

'M' is for the Million things she gave me,
'O' means Only that she's growing old,
'T' is for the Tears she shed to save me,
'H' is for her Heart of gold,
'E' is for her Eyes with love-light shining in them,
'R' means Right, and right she'll always be,





Put them all together, they spell 'MOTHER' a word that means the world to me. For those of you who are lucky to be still blessed with your Mom's presence on Earth, this story is beautiful. For those who aren't so blessed, this is even more beautiful

A dog is better than me.....

Intense pain would have raised in anyone's heart at the scene of that angry master hitting the dog very hard. The dog could have responded by biting the master BUT he didn't. The silent look in the dog's wet eyes can't be expressed in words. A look of sincerity which penetrates through the depth of soul, which might make the most cruel person cry. Motionless with a bowed head, a body language of the most obedient servant, who is ready to serve his master, obey every order and even give it's life for him, no matter how many times he hit it.

WHY ???

Because the master had given him food for few days.

How could have anyone controlled his tears when at one call the dog placed his head in his masters feet, ignoring what he did to him earlier.

And how many times do we place our head infront of our master after 5 calls a day, who doesn't even disgrace us the way that dog was disgraced. Instead HE says that after you do severe disobedience in everyway, if you walk towards me I run towards you.

HE keep feeding us even if we are disobedient to him, but he waits for us to repent, so that we may realize that He has blessed us with unimagineable blessings. He promises that I forgive all your pasts sins if you repent only ONCE sincerely from heart with an intention of not repeating them.

The dog shows his loyalty by guarding his masters house all night, but we don't show loyalty by guarding "ourselves" from sins which doesn't give benefit to our master but to ourself.

That dog better than US in terms of thankfulness, who's sincerity and obedience is only because of food and we have infinite reasons to show respect to our parents and our Allah through obedience in a REAL way....

Mujhe tum yaad aate ho...

Mujhe tum yaad aate ho...
Kahin baarish baras jaye...
Kahin sehra taras jaye...
Kahin kaali ghata utre...
Kahin baad-e-saba thehre...
Tumhare aur mere darmiyan...
Aa kar khuda thehre...
To meri zindagi ke awwal-o-aakhir...
Tum is lamhe...
Khuda kay baad aa'tay ho...

Mujhe tum yaad aate ho... :(

Zebra...

I was wondering, what colour is Zebra?
Is it black with white stripes on it?
or is it white with black stripes on it?

Im still wondering....

Just for the record...

I write this blog from my phone. Dont have enough time on my hands to use this from my pc.
For some odd and God knows what reasons i cant upload any pics on this blog. What the heck. No wonder this page is so boring.

Business Rivalry: Time to play the Game...

My lil town is witnessing a huge influx of Pakistanis everyday, i see new faces everyday. Anyways! Let me tell u how business works here, an asian is not allowed to open up a shop next to another asian's shop. These new faces broke this rule and opened a shop next to my dad's, last year. We ignored, keeping in mind that Allah gives rizq. We opened another shop for my cousin mani, now just yesterday i saw a new building being erected just a street away from our shop. The shop im talking about is in black neighbourhood. If those guys successfully build their shop our sales are gonna decrease. Its crystal clear that those guys are messing with us, last year they have done the same. Its time to play the Game, either they get their arse kicked outta this town or make peaceful business. Needs alot of time to think but its do or die situation. Where my thugs at? Yo! I used to be a lil nigger at school, role model of many and i still am the most famous chap in this city. Gone are the days when on my one call the whole school used to stand up. I posses hidden but cunning leadership qualities.

testing

..

If i fail...

If in my quest to achieve my goals
I stumble or crumble and lose my soul
Those that knew me would easily co-sign
There was never life as hard as mine
No love-no money-no chance and no guide
I only follow my voice inside
if it guides me wrong and I do not win
I'll learn from mistakes and try to achieve again...

Sometimes i cry...

Sometimes when I'm alone
I Cry
Cause I am on my own
The tears I cry are bitter and warm
They flow with life but take no form
I Cry because my heart is torn
I find it difficult to carry on
If I had an ear to confiding
I would cry among my treasured friend
but who do you know that stops that long
to help another carry on
The world moves fast and it would rather pass by
Then to stop and see what makes one cry
so painful and sad
And sometimes...
I Cry
and no one cares about why...

Ami: my nickname?

Funny, eh? I dont know what has got into people in my area, all of freaking sudden they've started calling me, Amy, Ami, Aami. I remember my teachers back in Cathedral School calling me with that name, but that was about 10 years ago. I also remember my neighbours addressing me by this name, but that was also many years ago. I remember some of my old online friends still refer to me as ami or ammi. But i think this sounds cute. I know little bit of french and ammie in french means beloved.
Other crazy nicknames i still have are The Game and King.

Pakistan

Oh man!!! what is my beautiful country turning into? Bomb blasts are so common and heard now and then.
People were crying about Musharraf and chanting slogons like go musharraf go, he is gone and i knew that the situation will be worst, people rejoiced and celebrated, dont you think that we Pakistanis always need a reason to celebrate? When Nawaz Shareef (in 1999) left, people celebrated, when Musharraf came, people celebrated. When PPP won (2008), people celebrated. All we ever do is celebrate. Pakistan was better, having mush its president then this crook zOrdari, who's always grinning, toothy decoit. Zardari cant even address our nation properly, he cant even speak and write properly, he is not fit enough to be out president. Bottom line is Pakistan is not united, its a dog-eat-dog world, sindhis against punjabis, balochis against pathans, mullah's against our youth's lifestyle, BUT please, the Quicker the better, before Pakistan turns into another Iraq and breaks into pieces, sindhistan, punjabistan, balochistan, pathanistan, etc, shun your differences, unit together and accept Mr. Zardari as President of Pakistan for the next 5 years InshAllah.

Pakistan Paindabad.

My hands...

A squash racket in my hands is worth about $5.
A squash racket in Jhangir Khan's hands is worth about $1 million.

It depends whose hands it's in.

A cricket ball in my hands is worth about $6.
A cricket ball in Imran Khan's hands is worth about $10 million.

It depends whose hands it's in.

A rod in my hands will keep away some wild animals. A rod in Hazrat Musa's (a.s) hands will part the mighty sea.

It depends whose hands it's in.


Two fish and 5 loaves of bread in my hands is a couple of fish sandwiches.

Two fish and 5 loaves in Allah's hands will feed Infinite living things.

It depends whose hands it's in.


As you see now it depends whose hands it's in.
So put your concerns, your worries, your fears your hopes, your dreams, your families and your relationships in Allah's hands because it depends whose hands it's in...

Matchbox in my pocket...

Inspired from Muhammad Ali (boxer)'s idea. Living in a sinful world, where its almost impossible to stay away from evil deeds. So now, i always keep a match box in my pocket. If I feel like committing sin, looking at a girl with a bad intention, feel like lying, swearing, hurting someone or anything like that, I burn a match stick and put it on my skin. It feels like Ooooh....that hurts, and then comes a thought im my mind, how would I feel when my whole body would be burning in the fire of hell (infinite times hotter in intensity) for committing such sins. It certainly is not worth it. May Allah ta'ala save us all from sins and lead us on the right path. I have realised that there is no use of committing a sin. We commit sins to cheer ourselves, to enjoy, to make us feel great, to make us feel happy but on the other hand our creater gets really angry. We make big claims like, we can do this for Allah, we can sacrifice for Islam, bla , bla, we dont really mean it. We claim to be strong, but in my eyez this is not power, power is when you stare at a girl's body and immediately lower your gaze for Allah's sake, power is when you feed a hungry, power is to forgive and ask for forgiveness from others., power is when you are capable of doing something bad but you overcome n control your nafs. I admit i had little bad habits in me, that had become my routine e.g short temper. But then i started to keep a match box or a lighter in my pocket, whenever i craved or felt like im about to lie, swear, lose my temper, etc i thought of hell's fire and the matches in my pocket.

Ammar vs World (crazy dialogues)

Guy (who wasnt fasting, offered me popcorns while knowing that im fasting): how about some fresh popcorns, tasty.
Ammar: Nah, thanx i'll be patience and wait for my popcorns in jannat.

Guy (who owed me money but wouldnt pay back n was still suffering)
Ammar: You know why im still happy n not suffering even though i dont owe anyone, its because i have a big heart.

100 things you never wanted to know about me..

100. I was born on a saturday.

99. I got 12 beauty spots clearly visible on my face.

98. I stand almost 6 feet tall.

97. I got 6-pack.

96. I got very long and girly eyelashes.

95. Im very short-tempered.

94. I've never lost my temper infront of anyone.

93. People who know me often wonder, do i ever get angry.

92. Im always smiling most of time.

91. You might never see me frowning.

90. I love staring at the mirror.

89. I love talking to myself.

88. My best friend is my mother.

87. Im very shy but i try to hide it.

86. I've been addicted to computers since 1998.

85. Noone has ever spelled or pronounced my name correctly for the first time.

84. I can fake almost every accent in seconds.

83. I was the only muslim n asian learner at my high school.

82. Im skinny.

81. But i played rugby.

80. I've been driving cars since i was 13.

79. But have never met an accident. Alhamdulillah.

78. I can try to communicate in 18 different languages.

77. I know sign language.

76. I've been learning chinese for many years but failed.

75. I wanted to be world famous but now i want to keep a low-profile.

74. Im addicted to chocolates.

73. My favourite chocolate is Flake.

72. The only Bush i trust is my own.

71. When days are dark, friends are few.

70. I dont have friends.

69. I think friends are not needed.

68. Im a loner.

67. I believe in love at first sight.

66. I never believed in love before 12-04-2008

65. I own 2 dogs.

64. I love animals and now plants too.

63. I hate showing off and hate those people who show-off.

62. I've traveled to 8 countries.

61. I got engaged on 12 April 2008.

60. I've never wore jewelry, watch, rings, necklaces, etc.

59. I can be your best friend.

58. Yet i can be your worst nightmare.

57. Im one-hand push up champion.

56. A status i achieved after 3 years of hardwork.

55. I love kids.

54. Im against racism.

53. I learned nothing at school.

52. I learned everything on my own.

51. Im a self-made man.

50. Im against the abuse of animals.

49. Im a professional chef.

48. I try my best to avoid arguments.

47. I dont fight by hands.

46. I fight by mind.

45. My favourite animal is cheetah.

44. I believe that dreams are as important as reality.

43. I think you are getting bored reading this.

42. I loved reading about tyrants, mainly Adolph Hitler.

41. My classmates used to call me 'walking encyclopedia'.

40. I think im a loser in life.

39. I hate watching t.v.

38. I've stopped watching Bollywood movies because of the way they are destroying and spoiling our nation and youth, with an exception of Nana. But our people are too blind too realise that.

37. Im very patriotic and proud of being a Pakistani.

36. I used to be a rapper and sing 2pac songs.

35. I think 2pac is dead.

34. I think wanna-bes need to get a life.

33. I think girls with alot of make-up are annoying and look unattractive.

32. I believe the judgement day is very near.

31. I believe suicide bombers are not muslims.

30. A muslim would never kill an innocent being.

29. I can write with both hands.

28. I always end up mixing business with pleasure.

27. I look at the world from my own view, from my own angle.

26. Im deeply inlove with someone.

25. She knows who she is.

24. My mother wanted me to be a doctor when i was 9.

...MORE TO COME SOON....

One of the greatest dreamz...

Im a day dreamer but i do dream at night just like my fellow humans. So on 17th september 2008 i dreamed one of best things. I saw Maulana Tariq Jamil, one of the greatest living Islamic scholars and lecturers. His bayaans are changing my life so rapidly and has already changed the life of millions of people e.g Junaid Jamshed, Saeed Anwar, etc. It was a wonderful dream and i had a great feeling after waking up. He was a great personality after Hazrat Yousuf (A.S) that i dreamt about. It was not a vision, i had clearly seen and felt Hazrat Yousuf (A.S) in a dream few years back. Subhan'Allah.

New shop, Ramadan and sleeping disorders

...RAMADAN.MUBARAK...
Alhamdulillah! By Allah's grace the new shop opened on 5th september. Kick my butt for not updating my blog but i was really busy. The shop is already very successful, the very 1st day it broke the record of the other 2 shops.. Hence, successful but no time to rest. Got to wake up at 3:30am because of Ramadan, then off to shop at 6, the shop usually closes off at 10am sometimes even late. So during most days i sleep for about 3 hours. I think im suffering from depression. Eating disorders, sleeping disorders, stress, chores, problems, headaches, taking things on my heart, etc its no surprise im depressed. On the other hand, Ramadan isnt going well, Sana says i must always thank Allah but thats what i always do.

Time waits for no one...

To realize the value of 1 year: Ask a student who has failed a final exam.


To realize the value of 1 month: Ask a mother who has given birth to a premature baby.


To realize the value of 1 week: Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.


To realize the value of 1 hour: Ask the couple who are waiting to meet.


To realize the value of 1 minute: Ask the person who has missed the train, bus or plane.


To realize the value of 1 second: Ask a person who has survived an accident.


To realize the value of 1 millisecond: Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics....

Fired

Woah! What a damn day....
Our new shop is almost complete, carrying loads of hopes... I dont mean to show off or something but i've masterminded that shop, im the one who organised everything, i worked day and night for it. My dad just spent the money. I build the new shop. BUT guess what, today my dad tells me that he is selling the electronics shop, the biggest and most popular one, he continues saying that i must look for a job, im no longer required because Mani (my cousin) will handle the new shop while he'll handle the other grocery shop. I was like WHAT? He said i never listened to him so now its too late. He was very harsh. Man, i worked so hard this time, even successfuly repaired some phones, but my dad's reaction towards me has never changed, im still and always be a zero and loser in life...
I dunno what to do now but Allah knows that this is so unfair... I deserve the credit, screw the credit, i should be allowed to work and be part of the new shop because while building of that shop i always planed my future. But im fired.

A random poem...

Life isnt always what it seems to be
Words cant express what you mean to me
Even though you are so far we are a team
In every sleep i meet you in my dream
In the future i cant wait to see
When i have you so close to me
When something is real its hard to conceal
You cant imagine all the pain i feel
Its kinda hard with you not being around
I know you are reading this and smiling down
But till the day we meet again sana
In my heart is where i keep you sana
Your memories give me strength i need to proceed
Your thoughts give me the courage to believe
My feelings for you i just cant define
I wish i could turn back the hands of time
I'll give anything to hear half your breath
We'll always be together even after death....

Some songs worth listening....

The only word to describe the following songs, is "U N B E L I E V A B L E".

They happen to be my fav songs as well... they just make my day and lift me up when im down... they drive me into such a feeling thats difficult to express... i mean they are just perfect, they lyrics, the beats, music, singers voice, etc, etc. And they happen to carry the same theme and message that i always carry in my heart and can never express in words....


Dreams by The Game
Juicy by Notorious B.I.G
My block by Tupac Shakur
Missing you by P.Diddy
I believe in you by Kylie Minogue
Like toy soldier by Eminem
Life's a bitch by Nas
Momma loves me by Jay-Z
If i had a million dollars by Eminem
Naughty girl by Beyonce
Capital punishment by Big Pun
Family business by Kanye West
Please dont stop the music by Rihanna

Quotes...

Some quotes.... weird n strange quotes....
Some quotes are my own quotes... some are taken...

My dreams are the only place I feel alive....

The person who said their was no second change in life was a stupid mothaf***

In life all u need is a dream n the will to make it happen....

Sleep is the cousin of death...

Reality is wrong, dreamz r for real...

A man's dreams are an index to his greatness...

It is not length of life, but depth of life...

Heart in my hand and ready to be torn....

Ready to die...


:INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES:

Happiness is not by chance, but by choice.
A man without a smiling face must not open a shop.
To be a great champion you must believe you are the best. If you’re not, pretend you are.
The optimist sees opportunity in every danger; the pessimist sees danger in every opportunity.
Eagles come in all shapes and sizes, but you will recognize them chiefly by their attitudes.
Everyone has his burden. What counts is how you carry it.
You dont take any chance or risk or play a game to come second, u wanna be 1st.
Loosing is not bad its just how u take it.
Defeat has given a reason to be around and im gonna come back n kick ur butt again.
The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire, size of your dream and how you handle disappointment along the way.
The only difference between a rich person and poor is how
they use their time.
It is not how much you make that counts but how much money you keep.
The rich dont work for money, the poor and middle class workj
for money. The rich have money work for them.
Realism is for people who lack imagination.
If you want happiness for an hour — take a nap.
If you want happiness for a day — go fishing.
If you want happiness for a year — inherit a fortune.
If you want happiness for a lifetime — help someone else.

My msn names...

I'll be posting my msn names here... i've got about 200 ppl added on my msn list.. and i believe that ive got the best msn names and online friends even copy my style and names...
i'll keep editing and updating this post....

this week my msn name is:

Live for everything, die for nothing...

last week i had:

An Ammar is forever....

Heart in my hand and ready to be torn...

other names are

Ready to die...
An Ammar is forver...
Born again...

The most shocking moment in South Africa...

We decided to form a small business partnership with the next door Indians, everything was ready, we almost signed the contract, my dad and cousin brought the stock for the new shop... My cousin had to leave his job and arrived just for this new shop... we did so much effort... BUT at the last moment.... the Indian thought hez a smart ass and cancelled the partnership... we all were so furious... especially my dad who lost his temper and wanted to beat him...

that was just so shocking... i am so worried now (cuz i organised everything and im the one who was suppose to manage the new shop) cuz that was only chance where i could show my dad that im serious about business and to show him that i've matured...

But as life goes on.... i have contacted my connection in the city.. met some friends... they said they'll organise a shop for me... then we can start the shop again....

Ya Allah plz help us....

I want to be Psychiatrist & everything.....

Yes, i have decided to study further.... no matter what it takes.... i'll study over the internet....

i wanna do Masters in Psychology
and then everything like..

Masters in Crminalogy..
Masters in Computer sciences..

everything...

so far i have done

Masters in Islamiyat..
Masters in English...

wish me good luck...

Time changes dust to stone...

No one and i mean it no one have heard this before.... but if u think about it, think deeply... by closing your eyez in a dark room where silence dominates... At tis moment on 19th of July 2008 at 6:22pm i Ammar Ali is nothing but this saying that time change dust to stone, btw im a dust atm... i will be something.... i have to be something.. cuz Allah has sent me here in this world so im here to leave my mark on it....

Dark thoughts....

Dear blog!
The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.
I cry for the time that you were almost mine, I cry for the memories I've left behind, I cry for the pain, the lost, the old the new, I cry for the times I thought I had you
Not all scars show, not all wounds heal Sometimes you can't always see. The pain someone feels. Whats the sense of wishing for something when I always just wish it away?
Every night i talk to the stars pretending its you.. it acts just like you tho.. far away and never replies to my questions
Why do people tell you to believe in what you want to but then tell you not to believe in the one true thing you do believe in? But time's a precious thing to waste, but friends are more precious-NO friends are useless...
The sad truth is that most evil is done by people who never make up their minds to be good or evil.The saddest aspect of life right now is that science gathers knowledge faster than society gathers wisdom. Do not assume that he who seeks to comfort you now, lives untroubled among the simple and quiet words that sometimes do you good. His life may also have much sadness and difficulty, that remains far beyond yours. Were it otherwise, he would never have been able to find these words...

Truly yours,
Ali Ammar

Aj main bohat udas tha....

Aj Main Bohat Udas Tha,

Apna na Koi Pass Tha ,

Yaadian ! kuch Ayeen Thii ,

Anso Be Sath Layeen Thii,

Lehrain Uthee Thii Kuch Ghum ki,

Alam e Bebasi Ka kuch Youn Tha,

Kashmakash Hai Samandar Main Ghum,

Tanhai ka Azab Main Muhabbaton Ka Sarab Main,

Awaz mari Apno Ki Ghunjhati Mari Kano Main,

Sawal Un ke Ankho Main Jwab Mary Ansoo Main,

Mousam E Dil Bohat Kharab Tha,

Aj Main Bohat udas Tha,

Apna na koi Pass Tha !!!!

My trip to Pakistan

Well! i have to admit that life is nothing but a game and life is very fast, faster than the lightning which strikes a lonely heart. I came back from Pakistan, cant believe it hey? Lived there like a KING for about 4 and half months.I aint bragging, im remembering Allah's blessings onto me. We were cool with that.
Anyways, so many things happened, my eyes are still full of some wonderful sights of the wonderful country, my homeland Pakistan. It was like a dream, i knew the life i live here is totally opposite to how i live in Pakistan but it didnt take me long to adjust. But what goes up must come down. Finally i had to come back to South Africa, i tried my best to make a living in Pakistan but i just could'nt, tried to find a good employment in Dubai as well but all my connections turned me down. My happiness and sadness, my success and loss has one thing in common, that is loneliness. I have always felt lonely and very insecure even if surrounded by so-called self-proclamed best mates. Deep inside i knew that what i have and and what i will have is only because of my parents prayers and by Allah's grace. Noone and i mean no one will help you when you are down but your parents especially mother. When dayz are friends are few. I have still got a very long way to go in life, i want to be something, i admit i should have studied further, when i saw young indivisuals doing masters in certain fields, i kinda looked in the mirror and said to myself, loser. I believe i can stil do something, but i just dont know what, i dont have any sources anymore, dad is not even talking to me, that i'll shed some light on it some other time, yea he isnt talking to me since i returned from Pakistan. By the way, something very interesting, i went to Pakistan on the valentines day and got back on my birthday. So i was talking about sources, sources are like tools, if handled cleverly, can be very useful, i think at this very moment my biggest tool is the internet. I usually spend about 3-4 hours per day on internet, doing nothing so important. Going on social sites and messing about, etc, etc. In Pakistan i never even watched t.v or used so much internet, i used to sleep at 1-2am and wake up at 9-10am, never ate on time, i felt that life there was very hectic and fast. Everything there was like had to move, people never stopped, sorry to say but Pakistanis are very rude, when you smile at them they never smile back, they love to stare at you if your are an alien from mars, they love to fight, they are very merciless, dishonest, they show no care to children or poors, they are not social friendly. They love to follow their local leaders or mullahs blindly, not doing their own research in search of betterment or truth. But again, five fingers are not same, there were some good people as well.
Trip to Pakistan was fun. I still miss it.

Im back

hi my mr/mrs bloggy! haven't written anything since ages, sorry, actually my life was so messed up, it still is, and finally after realizing that there is no way out, i turn back to you.
Lemme start from today, it was raining the whole day...